I wrote this song a real long time ago, a real real long time ago

Even while on vacation, I was thinking and observing for you. Here are the gems of wisdom I came up with (and am now posting a month later, whoops):
Have you ever noticed how carnivores, when they realize there is more than one veghead in a room, have to find and loudly congratulate each other? As though they are maybe upholding justice as the last stronghold of animal-eaters? What is the deal?
Also, when people see me eating veggieburgers, they act like they have caught me in some act of treason, and accuse me of secretly craving meat, and assert that if I want it so bad, I should just eat meat and get over it. All rational arguments aside, I came up with a mildly witty retort: “No, you just crave the flavorful succulence of vegetables and are trying to re-create it by cooking and seasoning that bland flesh just right, but give it up already. Vegetables are soooo much easier.”

From OBX, with love
P.S. I read some pages from the book Skinny Bitch, which advises women on how to become a skinny bitch (bitch in the sense that other women are overwhelmed with jealousy of how good you look). The book advocates veganism and is also hilarious. When I read it, I will submit a full report.